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Ten reasons to date a track runner:
10. Track runners are very handy in emergency situations. Ran out of gas 16 miles from the nearest town? Got lost somewhere in Yellowstone National Park’s 1 million acres? Send the track runner for help. Your date may turn out to be your best chance of survival.
9. Any good track runner will never leave home without adequate hydration. When amusement parks request six dollars and the rights to your first born child just for a fancy bottle of water, your honey will be ready with a bottle from home tucked sneakily into a jacket pocket.
8. Track runners are energetic to a fault. Harness this energy and use it for a worthy cause, such as a variety of home improvement projects that beg to be done.
7. They get up ridiculously early to pound out 10 miles before dawn. Though at first glance this would seem a drawback, in reality it is your ticket to a glorious morning. Without your significant other tugging on the sheets, your last few hours of sleep will be peaceful. With any luck, your little track runner will prepare your coffee, scoop up the newspaper before the neighbor’s dog does, and deposit both at your bedside.
6. Track runners are excellent at running in circles. When your sheep break free of the pasture and no herding dog can be found, you will be ready with an excellent replacement.
5. Should you ever be stuck on a desert island, your track runner will be able to spear you an endless supply of fish with such excellent javelin skills.
4. Track runners have discipline. This means that you do not need it. When the kids require someone to hover over them and force them to do homework, your significant other will be perfect for the job.
3. Running track prepares the body for a variety of physical assaults. So whatever your favorite sport happens to be, your honey will be well prepared to engage in it with you.
2. Flexibility. Useful in a variety of interesting situations.
1. Track runners have an endless supply of comfortable clothing to exercise in. This you will steal and put to good use while lounging on the couch with a pint of ice cream...
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