Top 10 Reasons To Date An EMT

Top ten reasons to date an EMT:
by suki

10) We are used to staying up all night.

9) We are good with multiple partners.

8) We are experts in mouth to mouth.

7) We are the best in rapid clothing removal.

6) We have our own multi-positional bed.

5) We shock the socks off you.

4) We always come when we are called.

3) We are prepared for any rhythm.

2) We are familiar with Latex and restraints.

And the ... 1 reason to date an EMT...

1) Anytime, anywhere, anyway you need us!

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Top 10 Reasons To Date Your Right Hand

Top ten reasons to date your right hand:

10. Doesn't care what movie you see, and means it.

9. Always puts out.

8. Goes everywhere with you.

7. No jealousy issues from the Left.

6. Has no lotion preference.

5. Knows your dick as well as you do.

4. Doesn't require contraceptives.

3. Has no qualms with "The stranger".

2. Won't cheat on you with your best friend.

And the number 1 reason...

It knows that your birthday is your anniversary, and won't get mad if you got too drunk to remember.

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Top 10 Reasons to Date a Suicide Ranger

Top Ten Reasons to Date a Suicide Ranger:
by Aimless

10. You'll always get free food at the casino buffet.

9. "How" isn't just a question but a greeting!

8. He'll always have long rambling stories about how funny he is so no awkward silences.

7. Free tomatoes after every gig!

6. With a name like "Suicide" you are guaranteed no messy commitment.

5. He has a GREAT little bit about how he got his name.

4. You'll get to hear his bit about how he got his name A LOT.

3. Did he ever tell you the one about how he got his name??

2. He has a great view on "stealing" vs. "re-writing".

and the NUMBER ONE REASON FOR DATING SUICIDE RANGER...

1. See when a child is born it is the father's job to head out into nature and name the child after the fist thing his family grew up in the suburbs, so his sisters have names like "Jumping Rope" and "Little Big wheel” his brother's name is "Running Hose” You can call him "Crazy Neighbor” He had a nephew who was born at night and his name is "Peeping Tom".

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Top 10 Reasons To Date a Tennis Player

Top Ten Reasons To Date a Tennis Player:

1. We're always looking for a good opportunity to come up.

2. We can do it with two people or four. (I prefer two.)

3. We have good hands.

4. We grunt when the action heats up.

5. We know how to make a racket.

6. We can hit it from all angles.

7. We have the endurace to last 3 hours ... straight!

8. We wear shorts to hold the balls.

9. We want it easy, but hard is good too.

10. Even when tennis players aren't scoring, we're in love.

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10 Reasons Why You Should Date a Fat Girl

craigslist.org

Here you go girls. One from your own kind. Infighting within the female of the species. MEOW!!!

10 reasons why you should date a fat girl:

I'm tired of seeing really ugly thin women with nice looking guys. What about us cute fat girls? Wouldn't you rather be with a pretty girl? You can work on the fat, but you can't work with ugly...

1. If you take the fat away from the fat girl, she'll be fucking smoking;you take the skinny from the skinny chick...she'll still look like an ugly ass horse.

2. You might not be able to pick her up, but she can PICK you up.

3. No more blankets.

4. Larger mouth capacity.

5. She'll let you eat beef--she'll probably eat most of it.

6. This is cliche, but "more cushion for the pushin".

7. She's probably an emotional wreck, so if you show her the least bit attention, she'll be at your beck and call.

8. Bear hugs.

9. Let me repeat, larger mouth capacity.

10. Economy size. More is Better. Bigger is better.


So if you find any of this humorous, or would like to add on to this post, please comment.

I'm sure i'll be inundated with hate mail, so to all the haters out there, Bring it!

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